April, 2010 -- Overcoming the fear of loss

"I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."
Isaiah 46:4

This fear may be more prevalent now than in quite some time. So many of us or those we know are fearing a loss of a job or a home or the life we’ve led before. It’s easy to panic and worry and practically stop any building of any kind. But we don’t have to let this fear knock us off the ladder, because we can rest instead in this opportunity for grace to surround us like sunshine when there’s much work to do.

Sometimes the fear of a loss -- not even the loss itself -- can confuse our thinking and cause us to make poor choices. We can retreat, second-guess ourselves, refuse to trust God, and lose all faith in His provision and care. We forget the grace He supplies to meet this fear.

Fearing a loss won’t stop the loss -- unless of course it causes us to address and change some damaging behavior. Decide if that’s possible in your case and put a plan into effect to help yourself [for example, if you’re habitually late for work and afraid you’ll lose your job because of it, don’t be late. I know that may be a silly example, but you get the idea.], and it can work because of God’s grace that surrounds us like sunshine and energy when the to-do list is long and time is short.

Whether we’re afraid of losing something as real as a job or as hard to grasp as someone’s approval, too often -- before we rest in God’s grace -- we can be untrue to who we are. We might do something that’s stupid or a waste of time when we could do something else – build.

God’s presence and grace gives us a strategy to grip the ladder when we’re staring a loss in the face and wondering how to deal with it. We can honestly assess the situation before us, make smart choices, and continue to live as God’s directing us. He may not reveal the whole building plan to us all at once, but He’ll guide us with work to do today and then tomorrow. Our work that’s true to Him will replace the fear. Let’s take a quick look at each part of the strategy.

*We can honestly assess the situation before us. Often we fear what we don’t know, so it’s important to get as much information about the situation you’re afraid of that you can. Over-reaction, quick moves, careless words – all that just makes things worse. Ignoring a potentially serious situation with a head-in-the-sand attitude isn’t being honest about your life either. Know as much as you can about what you fear, then deal with it—smartly—and securely because you know you’re not alone.

*We can make smart choices. We can do the getting-to-work-on-time thing. We can do the work that’s required of us. We can keep promises or commitments. But perhaps more important than any of that, we can keep our minds focused on who we are in God’s plan -- not worry about what He’s no doubt already figured out anyway. I know that sounds simplistic and even patronizing, but the point is that the first smart choice we make every day when we’re fearing a loss is to choose God over the fear we feel, to receive His grace for that day, even for that moment, and reflect Him in the next thing we do.

*We can continue to live as God’s directing us -- doing as Peter himself advised: Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you [1 Peter 5:7]. We can build on the wall in front of us, one brick at a time. We can talk to Him frequently and listen to His guidance. We can remember everything He’s taught us, draw on the strength His presence provides, and we can walk through each day in trust -- that’s really all He asks. And if we do that, trust and obey without fear, we will build with His provision and care —- just like He planned all along ~~

because this opportunity for grace to surround us like sunshine when there’s much work to do is an opportunity we don’t want to miss.

- What are you afraid you’ll lose – a job, financial security, career opportunities, love, esteem? How have you faced any of those losses in the past and overcome them?
- How has the fear affected your relationship with God?
- What about your potential loss frightens you so? Is it because you feel alone or forgotten by God? How do you think God sees your fear?

o ~ o ~o

Please visit April's Partner Blogger: Tammy at My Heart . . . His words and join her as well as we explore this topic.

You can read below or download the study of Peter for yourself or your group.

Thanks for being part of our tour . . . please post your comments and stories for all our readers. See you soon! God bless you.

From the book . . .

Chapter 15

Now and later

We read about Moses leading the Israelites of his time (our story’s ancestors) out of Egypt and all the challenges they encountered. They were free! Released from the bonds of a tyrant, free to travel to a land promised by their God! How could they be anything but courageous and joyful! Oh, how indeed.

When everything didn’t go to suit them or wasn’t particularly comfortable, they fed off each other’s complaints, squeezed God out of their hearts, and gave in to the fear of the unknown. As the Hebrews were running from their Egyptian masters, the pursuers got close. The pursued got scared.

As Pharaoh approached, the Israelites looked up, and there were the Egyptians, marching after them. They were terrified and cried out to the Lord.
Exodus 14:10

Now that crying out part make sense to us, and their action -- their turning to God for help -- must have even pleased Him. He could understand a momentary heart-stop because they had been captive a long time, and they didn’t have a Power Point presentation or website to tell them what lay ahead in the land of freedom. But it’s the next verse that’s so funny -- and so telling about our human nature that hasn’t changed since the beginning of time. When has our own sarcastic streak ridden in on a racehorse of fear? Wonder if God smiled?

The Israelites speak to Moses: “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die?” (Exodus 14:11)

Well, there’s a Mt. Sinai’s worth of negative thinking and a heart empty of trust and worship. Apparently, they made the right appeal but didn’t listen to God’s answer or even give Him a chance to comfort them. Their fear turned them hard and cold, bitter and defeated. The children of Israel, God’s chosen, focused on a place to die instead of a life to live, too scared to remember the promises of their Lord.

But perhaps I should temper my criticism. Isn’t that me when God is leading me somewhere new, somewhere a little scary, somewhere I can't see?
When we see the pursuers of whatever form getting close to us, despite what assurances we’ve been given, we can sometimes lapse into desperate fear too. Unstable because we stand on trust as visible as bandwidth, we still wish for the life of a secure disciple at work, and wonder behind a closed curtain when our time will come.

What do you do when the bad guys are chasing you? What do you do when your efforts to grow fruit (John 15:5) meet criticism and greed from those you seek to help? What do you do when the relationship you expected by now hasn’t come and you feel alone? What do you do when resources you counted on in the past are gone?

Fear comes, no doubt about it, but it never comes alone. It brings courage or collapse on its heals. We have to choose quickly, because fear and collapse can make us do strange things, like stand wet-legged in the very river that would carry us closer to God while we complain about the scenery. Courage says build a boat.

~ ~ ~

Hard Hat Zone

Building in the moments

Your temple -- your life -- is not like one of those super-compressed towels you place in water that expands fifty-fold in three seconds. It’s the daily weaving of all the threads together to form something that more closely resembles Christ, made from the pattern He’s drawn for us. So the building we do in those moments of fear make more or less of our temples.

In the moment when fear threatens to overtake you, remember to grip the ladder tighter and focus only on the rung immediately ahead of you. Say yes to the part that says “I believe I can keep building,” and do what is within your reach at that moment. God will supply the courage you need for that moment and the rest to come -- if your focus remains on Him instead of the rubble or horizon around you. That’s His department.

At that fearful moment -- the worrisome diagnosis from the doctor, a damaging secret revealed in your marriage, a friend’s betrayal -- whatever shakes your ladder:

* pray first and don’t stop
* rest your body and mind
* thank God for His grace to bear this situation
* be where you need to be
* let go of minor thoughts
* take care of your basic needs
* gather your facts and check your resources
* focus on God’s control
* listen for your immediate guidance—nothing more
* do what you see—nothing more
* trust God to see what you don’t.

All of this behavior in trust prepares you to combat the stifling fear and handle well the situation you’re facing. One step at a time is the only way to work through these especially frightful times, and it’s all God asks. Build in these moments a lifetime of trust.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

Read below or download the study of Peter for yourself or your group.

A brief study of Peter

When we think of Peter, we think of someone strong and noble, born to lead and led by his own heart. That’s true, but there’s always something more we can learn from a peek into Peter’s life.

Peter might seem an unlikely person to take a look at regarding any fears, because we know him as “the rock” Jesus would build His church on [Matthew 16:18], but Peter was not without weaknesses. He was afraid of losing something one time too, perhaps his place in a group or acceptance among those in power, but what he learned was that our faith must rest in God because only from there can we build anything.

Despite Peter’s claims of loyalty, Jesus told him, “I tell you the truth, Peter—before the rooster crows tomorrow morning, you will deny three times that you even know me.” [John 13:38] And of course, that’s what happened. Among soldiers, guards and even slaves of the high priest after Jesus’ arrest, Peter denied being one of Christ’s disciples. Was it the fear of being identified with Jesus and losing the comfort and ease he was used to that caused Peter to make such poor choices?

Sometimes we do that. The fear of losing something transient in this life can make us behave poorly because we’re trusting more in what we have here [security, power, position] than what we have in God. We see something slipping away, or the potential for that to happen, and we grab on tighter and speak or behave contrary to our true feelings.

Of course Peter loved Jesus, but fear kept him from building right then when he had the opportunity and caused him to tear down instead. And we can learn much from him when we’re faced with a similar situation, when we’re afraid to be true to who we are. When Peter realized what he’d done, he cried, aware of his betrayal [Matthew 26:75].

He knew that nothing was worth denying his Savior because everything comes from God and we can trust His provision and care—and His forgiveness. No matter what we have or what we may lose, it doesn’t change God’s grasp of our lives.

Peter wrote to Jewish Christians who were in a tight spot—facing trials and persecutions from those who didn’t agree with their faith. No doubt they feared the loss of everything including their lives. Peter talked to them about enduring those fears with grace and faith.

These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. [1 Peter 1:7]

Peter is saying that no matter what the world threatens us with, God is still God, still in charge of all our building and completely understanding of our human fears and weaknesses. The best response is simple trust.

Humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. [1 Peter 5:6-7], Peter says.

God planned it, he built it.

Loss or potential loss seems be around us all the time, but we can choose to trust in God’s provision and care and build anyway. We can learn from our mistakes and live up to the life Jesus set aside for us as surely as He chose Peter to build upon. Despite his stumbles and mistakes, the build continued just as God planned. So will ours if we’ll learn from our mistakes as well and make ourselves available again to God, whether we face a loss or not. Doesn’t really make any difference—trust is what matters.

I know we both understand the fear of loss. It’s terrifying and paralyzing in some cases, but God doesn’t change because our circumstances might. If what we counted on in the past is gone, God will replace it with something else, and we will see that what we need to count on the most is Him and His care and provision, despite our own “rooster crowing” moments. The jobsite remains.

So lets strap on our toolbelt despite our fear, leave our misjudgments and mis-thinking in the past, and focus only on what our Architect puts in front of us to build. We can carry on unafraid when we build with faith in God’s provision and care. He didn’t give up on Peter, and He’ll never give us on us either.

May God bless your building . . . .

o ~ o ~o

How have you let the fear of loss dictate your actions in the past?

How have your fear-driven decisions helped you—or have you seen that they’ve interfered with your building along God’s plan instead?

As losses have come and gone in your life, how have you gotten better at dealing with that fear and trusting God’s provision and care?

o ~ o ~o

Download this study of Peter in pdf for easy printing for yourself or your group: Go here.

Thanks for being part of our tour . . . please post your comments and stories for all our readers. See you soon! God bless you.

Yet again . . .

I hope you’ve had a great month of March so far, and thanks again for being part of our tour!

Seems like a little more of the same here – yet another failure for me, but hopefully I can be like those persistent flowers that show up even when we think they won’t, when we’re so tired of the cold and dark. It’s tough to keep trying and waiting and then have nothing to show for it, but we soldier on, trusting everything is part of the building, believing we’ll look back one day and see how we stood on the scaffolding constructed from this failure. Hope to see you there . . . .


Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6

March, 2010 -- Overcoming the fear of failure

My righteousness will never fail. Isaiah 51:6

Fear of failing comes to us in many forms. We sometimes fear failing on the job or failing at a skill, often failing in a relationship. We may fear we’ve failed at life in general, that we haven’t reached goals we set or become what we wanted to be—and that we never will. But we can put these fears away.

One great part about God’s plan is that it doesn’t end. Even though we’ve failed in the past (and all of us have), that’s no guarantee we’ll fail in the future. If we’re not where we want to be now (and many of us aren’t), that doesn’t guarantee a bad future. But the fear of failing can often keep us from trying again, from listening to God’s prompts, from building what’s waiting to be built.

But some preparation will help us overcome this fear and build with willingness, belief and patience, and we can start today and build one day at a time.

Discouragement and disappointment can take over our lives and stop us still, unable to even look at a stack of boards and see something in the making. I think what happens is that often, after too many falling walls and wrecked plans, we begin to plan for failure instead of success, and we let that plan overtake God’s.

Sure it’s easy to give in to the fear, but a better use of our time and energy is to prepare for success, and we do that in a couple ways.

*Reassess your goals. No matter how tall and beautiful your temple may be, I can’t duplicate it, and if I try, I will fail, because God’s designed our temples like our fingerprints, one to the soul.

When my temple -- my life -- remains in disarray with tools scattered everywhere, I have to know how to guide it and build it better. Am I clear about where I’m going and what I want the next floor to look like? If not, I will surely fail there too. Success is a lot more likely with a clear understanding of my goals and a plan to get there. Jesus knew, and He gave us a way to work unafraid.

When Jesus was in Jerusalem for a festival, He was at the pool of Bethesda and saw the injured and sick people there, each hoping to be first in the pool when it stirred and be cured. He approached one man who’d been waiting 38 years.

When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”
“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.”
Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” [John 5:6-8 NIV]

We can learn at least four points from that story to help us prepare for success:

- God is waiting on us to make a choice. Jesus’ first question to the man wasn’t about his history or condition, but his intent, and his next move depended on that answer. He’s asking us the same thing. Do we want to get well? Do we want to overcome this fear and take some risks to build and grow and live the way God’s planned for us?

- If our answer to Jesus’ question is yes and we choose to overcome our fears, then we need to follow His directions and “Get up!” – “get up” in our mind, our attitude, our belief -- and prepare for what’s next. Once we focus on God’s plan and put ourselves in it, we can build without fear.

- Preparing for success means being willing to work for it. Jesus told the man to pick up his mat -- not to wait for someone else to get it or leave it there, but to carry what he would need with him. He’s telling us to prepare with proper training, supplies, practice -- whatever we need to keep building. He makes the plan, we carry out our part.

- God’s certainly been patient with us, so we can do the same and start where we are, just like Jesus told the man. “Walk,” He said, not run, not cartwheel, not go back and fix everything that’s happened in the past, just walk. He’s saying put up one board today, hang one door today, lay just a few bricks today, and tomorrow we’ll work some more. Patience is easier when we’re walking in the right direction.


*Develop a long-range plan. You can bet God’s got one with your name on it. Your long-range plan will help you meet short-range goals, and that helps you progress one day at a time, building as you go without fear.

Your long-range plan doesn’t have to be for the rest of your life or include everything you ever hope to do all at once. Focus on one project, if you like, or look just one year out. Choose a finish line you can identify and small, measurable steps to get you there. That's preparing for success, not fearing failure.

With these strategies and with willingness, belief and patience, get to work. Soon, you’re waist-deep in the water you feared having around your ankles, and the result is even more building!

Please think about these questions and if you will, respond for our other builders here:

-why does fear of failing interfere with your life so much, or why has it in the past?
-how has it stopped you from building what you felt God wanted you to build?
-how will you plan for success in your life today and follow Jesus’ plan for the man at the pool?

Read below or download the study of Gideon for yourself or your group. Thanks for being here!

From the book . . .

Chapter 19

Stable in God’s companionship

Haggai, the Lord’s messenger, gave this message of the Lord to the people:
“I am with you . . . . My Spirit remains among you.”
Haggai 1:13, 2:5

Since God planted Adam and Even in the garden, He’s had a persistent habit of being with us. I doubt He ever planned it any other way. He made us smart and capable, but He made us to work best with Him at the center of our lives. I think He knew that despite our tendency to get a little full of ourselves now and then, we’d always get scared again sooner or later.

We’d always feel and understand the need for Someone smarter and more capable than we are to be in charge. We’d always be willing, but we’d frequently be stalled. So He planned from the very beginning a consistently hands-on management style with us, an oversight of our situation no matter what else was going on, and a reminder of all we need to know—a fire rekindled to light and fuel us when we’re cold and afraid.

And He promised. Sometimes we forget. Sometimes we equate not seeing what we expect to see with Him not doing what He promised He’d do. It’s a practice that hurts and leaves us stalled, and it’s wrong. But we can fix it, because He promised.

I know that alone feeling, the worst alone feeling there is, like my blood vessels are separated from my heart and I’m going on that last bit of inertia that pulsed life into me before it faded like the ending of a song on the radio. It’s a feeling of being separated from God, wobbly and wavering, too weak to face whatever injustice befalls me and too afraid to dare to achieve whatever goal inspires me.

I think my bones must be made of fear and my will dust in a tornado, my hope absent as an infant’s guilt. Temples may need to be built, but by me? Surely not. No scaffolding seems strong enough to sturdy me for the job, no safety harness sure enough to catch me if I should fall. How can I do this job on unstable feet, with hesitant hands? How can I do this . . . alone?

I wonder if God keeps a list of all His children who’ve felt that way? Not to hold it against us, of course, because He’s masterfully forgetful of our shortcomings, but perhaps just to review the moments when our real belief came shining through like a newly confident jury surveying an innocent man.

How pleased He must be when we simply claim His promise instead of doubt His willingness to keep it. How sad He must be for us when we wonder if the system He designed works for us today, still, as reliably as He said. Perhaps He looks back now and then and thinks, “My dear little children . . . when will they allow themselves to claim this promise from Me and trust Me to be with them? I’ll just keep reminding them . . . .”

It amazes me to think how big our world is. And it scares me. Who am I that God should be here with me when He has so much else to do? And why? So I give human characteristics to God’s will and abilities and get stuck in the fear of “what if.” What if He’s less than reliable? What if He does forget about me? What if I fall off this ladder and crack my head open because He isn’t there to catch me? Unafraid sounds unattainable, and yet . . . I can’t give up.

I want the only “what if” I live with to be what if I hadn’t trusted God, and then I laugh out loud like a kid on her first cake walk win at a carnival. I want the impossibility of that “what if” to be a cause for joy that He and I talk about for a long time to come.

Inspection Point

What if He’s asking “what if” too?

We have to remember that our building project is a collaboration, that God works with us and studies our actions and reactions to guide us well.

When my jobsite looks like a toddler took over with a thousand blocks and a bottle cap to stack them on, I imagine He’s wondering “what if” I had listened to Him, “what if” I had trusted Him with the great blueprint He wanted to entrust to me.
I wonder if it’s too late to begin again, or will His guidance and security and presence come. Do you wonder?

* When have you felt too weak or unworthy to be significant to God?
* What are the “what ifs” in your life today, blocking your build?
* What “what if” has God been urging you to answer and put to rest?

Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust.
Psalm 40:4

Stalled, feeling way too small for God’s big request? Throughout our history, God’s found His human help in unlikely vessels. Gideon was one of those picked despite his apparent lack of credentials, and he knew it himself. But when the Israelites were under attack by Midian, God chose Gideon to settle the dispute.

When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior” (Judges 6:12). Yes, Gideon felt too little, perhaps because he forgot for a moment how God does all the heavy lifting. Perhaps he forgot that the might of our enemy is a breath of a breeze in the hurricane of God’s power. As always—our biggest job is to trust and that’s not dependent on size at all. We’re always big enough. He still promises He’s with you.

Read below or download the study of Gideon for yourself or your group.

A brief study of Gideon

Gideon’s story is told in Judges 6 and 7

The nation of Israel was suffering under the mistreatment of the Midianites [in the early 1100s BC] and God and the Israelites had had enough. The people asked God for help and like always, He had a plan. But the person He picked to lead this building project felt inadequate, small, afraid of failing.

“How can I rescue Israel? My clan is the weakest in the whole tribe of Manasseh, and I am the least in my entire family!” Gideon wanted God to know [Judges 6:15].

Maybe we’ve felt the same way – totally unprepared and ill-equipped to do the building in front of us, afraid of failing because of what we felt we had to build with. God had an answer for Gideon, and it applies to us too.

“Go with the strength you have . . . . I am sending you . . . . I will be with you,” He told Gideon [Judges 6:14,16].

God saw all He needed to see for Gideon to succeed—the strength he already had, despite where he came from or what family he belonged to or what education he had or anything else. Can you imagine God having said, “I am sending you…unprepared and sure to fail”? Not likely.

When we don’t feel up to the job before us, we often find excuses just like Gideon did. Maybe it’s a lack of money or the proper education, a bad location or a stained past—it doesn’t matter. Apparently what God focuses on is the “strength we have,” not the lack or lackluster appearance we’re so obsessed with. And in Gideon’s case, He wanted Gideon and everyone else to know that success in any form doesn’t come from what we control but from God’s hand — our job is just to build where He says while He directs the whole plan.

Gideon prepared as we might when facing a big task: heavily. He gathered 32,000 soldiers and headed out to find the enemy. Not so fast.

“The Lord said to Gideon, “You have too many warriors with you. If I let all of you fight the Midianites, the Israelites will boast to me that they saved themselves by their own strength.” [Judges 7:2]

See? Perhaps we’ve looked at a lot of fearful situations where we might fail in the wrong way, while God was only seeing an opportunity.

He finally reduced Gideon’s fighting force to 300 men, and on paper, they didn’t have a chance against the Midianite army. But what they did have to rely on was their trust in God, their full dependence on and obedience to Him, win or lose. That’s just the way He wanted it. They obeyed God’s direction and discovered the courage within themselves to overcome their fear and build.

God caused such confusion among the Midianite army that they ended up killing one another or running away. Gideon and his undersized army never touched a soldier, but they acted in trust and obedience, believing in the God who sent them there, planning for victory.

God planned it, he built it.

Today we face challenges of the heart and mind, and we may feel completely unprepared to fight them, pushed down by failures in the past. Maybe you’re fighting addiction or depression, temptation or confusion, anger or hopelessness. But we don’t have to be afraid because God is with us too, and just like He saw the potential in Gideon, He sees the potential in all of us.

“Go with the strength you have,” He’s telling us today. Even if we don’t feel that courage and ability, God will awaken it in us and guide us day by day. Our victories may not come as swiftly as Gideon’s, but our building remains to be done, each swing of the hammer adding up to the success God already sees.

Failing in the outside ways we see may be simply failing to trust and obey, afraid that any move will be the wrong one so we make no move at all. But God says go ahead, work, try, build—and board by board, we can overcome our fear of failing and build with willingness, belief and patience.

If we’re willing to accept the challenge before us, believe God’s chosen us for the victory in His plan, and work patiently through each day, we’ll look back after a while at a whole ‘nother floor to our temple. It may take a long time of building, but we don’t have to fear the work. God is with us. He said so.

May God bless your building . . . .

o ~ o ~ o

How would you have responded if you had been in Gideon’s place?

When have you released your plans and followed God’s will in a fearful situation?

What have you learned about overcoming a fear of failure that you will help you build bigger temples in your life?

o ~ o ~ o

Download this study of Gideon in pdf for easy printing for yourself or your group:
Go here.

Thanks for being part of our tour . . . please post your comments and stories for all our readers. See you soon! God bless you.